approval

[VIDEO] Is it normal to feel like my happiness is tied to how others see me?

July 26, 2012

Readers over at YourTango have asked me a bunch of love and relationship questions. I finally answered some of them. This one is from a woman who says her happiness is tied to how others see her. She feels powerless and at the mercy of others’ approval for her own happiness. Been there?

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Why you don’t love yourself more. And how to.

May 1, 2011

Improving self-love and decreasing the desire for approval are part of my life every single day. I’m either helping other people through it, or I’m working on my own issues with it. Constantly. We love ourselves just fine at first. Then something happens. I remember this vividly from my own childhood. I’d have an idea [...]

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When your Parent Can’t Give You the Love You Deserve

December 9, 2010

I knew I’d write about this someday, but it wasn’t supposed to be now. Then a friend confided in me that she was scared to death that her mother—who doesn’t show her much love or approval—was right about her. And someone else turned to me when her relationship with her parents unraveled because they couldn’t [...]

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Do You Care what Other People Think of You?

November 2, 2010

I traffic in fear. Much of my day involves hearing clients’ fears. The most popular? “Joe Schmoe won’t like me”. They’re worried about what so-and-so thinks of them, or they’re doing X—which they hate to do—because another person’s opinion matters so much. Worrying about approval from others is an epidemic. Maybe even a pandemic. People [...]

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Self-Love: To my Daughter

June 4, 2010

I asked my husband the other day what he thinks is most important for our daughter to learn. If he could have her learn just one life lesson, what would it be?  He said to be kind to others. That sounds nice and I get where he’s coming from. But as someone who coaches women [...]

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