In her book Life is a Verb, Patti Digh says, “We give up our power to the very people who took it from us in the first place.”
Right on, sister.
If you’re upset with Them about what They did, didn’t do, or should have done, you’re giving Them a lot of power, aren’t you? You’re essentially holding Them responsible for your happiness.
You get assigned to the hard-to-work-for client on the never-ending account at work, and you let it affect your life. They shouldn’t have done this to you! It’s not fair! They’ve made your life much worse, right? Wait a minute…wouldn’t that mean They have the power to affect your quality of life? Well, that sucks. You live as if They have more say in your life than you do. No wonder you’re mad.
Your spouse isn’t doing what you want. Again. And that feels like Him or Her taking some of your happiness away. So you go on a rampage about what He or She should be doing to make you happy but what does that rampage do? It hands Him or Her responsibility for your life on a silver platter.
The next time someone does something that leaves you feeling powerless, take that as a cue to the focus on what You can do about it.
Rather than saying, They better knock it off or else….
Try saying, They did what They did but here’s what I’m going to do for myself. Don’t leave your well-being in Their hands. They obviously aren’t managing it the way you would.