Trying to gain others’ approval—or even just worrying about their opinion of you—is a bit of a pandemic. If you are one of the stricken, this comes as no surprise. If you’re immune to this particular affliction, consider yourself blessed. I’m constantly thinking about new ways to lessen approval-seeking. New ways to quiet the voice
Your rational mind knows this, but I’m speaking to the irrational part: You can’t take on other people’s pain. You can’t grieve for them. There is no amount of tears you can shed that will lessen theirs. When my kid is sick, there is no amount of sick I can make myself (with worry, no
Whose opinion do you trust? When all those outside opinions of you are screaming in your head, which one is loudest? Which carries the most weight? Which one do you believe over the others? The voice that sounds most assertive or confident? The deepest (male) one? The oldest one? The most Catholic, Jewish, or Buddhist
Are you working on something? My grandma says she’s working on a quilt; my friend says she’s working on scrapbooks for her kids. Or like many of us, maybe you say you’re working on yourself. You might say you’re working on your relationship or you’re working on accepting yourself more or you’re working on discovering
I have a favorite new visual for calming my mind and getting to the “bottom” of things. Like the bottom of a swimming pool, actually… It’s calm at the bottom of things. The trick is keeping the waves down so that you can notice the calm. Can you float on the surface all still and
My daughter got a book from her aunt. It wasn’t even an intentional gift; it was thrown in with a bag of art supplies and hand-me-downs, all nonchalant-like. It’s called On the Night You Were Born. I read it to her the other day. It begins: On the night you were born, The moon smiled
